The Curious Self & Birthing

Well, that's an interesting title for a blog post, you say.

This morning in church, the pastor mentioned the birthing metaphor in Christianity. He talked about being "born again" and what that means. So, naturally, I went on a random thought tangent about birthing-- right there in the middle of the service.

Most Christians understand the phrase "born again" as something either synonymous with or closely related to "accepting Christ" and "being saved." It's the moment when you give your life to Christ, and He forgives you of your sin. But I have to wonder. See, the moment when you actually admit that you've failed is actually a joyous one--yes, it might be difficult to come to that point, but when we actually accept that we have failed, we realize that there is an alternative. There is hope; it's only up from there. Acceptance is the first stage. So the actual moment is joyous, and I have to wonder if that's what being "born again" is. It's a freeing moment when you realize Love conquers all; it's not a moment when you're thinking about your pain. You're experiencing life with out it for, maybe, the first time.

I say all this not to espouse religious doctrine but to point out the contrast between that joyous occasion and the actual birthing process. Because it's not a pretty, simple, pain-free experience. Women often do things like yell at family, blame their spouses, hurt doctors... these are not the most appealing or genteel moments of a woman's life. Yes, something beautiful exists as a result of this work, but the actual moment where the birthing takes place is not easy.

I have to wonder if being "born again" has more to do with the daily life of someone who wants to be like Christ. Ripping band-aids off wounds that we've just let fester. Getting over our pride and apologizing to friends for friendships we let die over fights that never settled. Accepting something into your life, like a new understanding of politics or society, that just might contradict what you thought you knew was right. Admitting that you have a problem. I think being "reborn" might be something that throws our closets open and exposes the skeletons for what they are--pieces of ourselves that we'd rather hide than face.

So I wonder if a person who is thinking, re-inventing, and wondering, is on a closer path to Love, Truth, and Peace than the one who only allows Love to expose selected parts of the heart. Could constant curiosity, through its existence as a conduit to the unknown, actually bring one closer to God?